Speaker: Dr. Harold J. Sala | Series: Guidelines For Living | Simply let your “Yes” be “Yes,” and your “No,” “No”; anything beyond this comes from the evil one. Matthew 5:37

Have you ever been at a party where someone whispered something to the person next to her, and that person in turn told the person what he or she thought had been said and so forth, until the original statement had gone the rounds of those present? Then, the last person told what he had heard. Was it much different than what had started out? Chances are the answer is “Yes!” So it is in life.

A psychology professor ran a series of experiments to prove the velocity of gossip. He called six students into his office, and in strict confidence informed them that the Duke and Duchess of Windsor were planning on attending a certain university function. Within a week, the completely fictitious story had reached no less than 2,000 students. City officials phoned the university, demanding to know why they had not been informed, and press agencies were frantically phoning for details. Besides this, the facts were completely garbled. Instead of the Duke and Duchess of Windsor, a newspaper man in Canada phoned asking if it really was true that the Queen and Prime Minister were going to be present.

Another story that made the rounds was that the President of the university and the Duchess of Windsor had been secretly married before the Duchess married the Duke. Another rumor was that the university was going to award an honorary degree to Prince Charles, who was then in the first grade. Remember that all of these rumors came from those original six who received this information in “strictest confidence.” Dr. Cantrell observed, “That was a pleasant rumor. A slanderous one travels even faster, and gets even more confused.”

One publisher has declared, “If you are an articulate person you utter some 30,000 words each day.” He might have added that a great many of them are spoken without particular thought. Four hundred years before Christ, Socrates once said, “Speak that I may know thee.” He meant that what you say indicates what you are. A greater than Socrates, Jesus Christ, said, “Out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks” (Matthew 12:34).

What about the words which come out of your mouth? Take, for instance, what you have said the past thirty minutes. Is it possible that you might have contributed to someone’s personal unhappiness by passing on something that could have hurt someone? Solomon declared, “Without wood a fire goes out; without gossip a quarrel dies down” (Proverbs 26:20).

In some cases gossip, or words spoken with an inflection, can be more deadly than the bullets of an assassin. I know of one pastor who was made the target of abuse by a group of people who deliberately set out to take his scalp. They did, too! He was exonerated by his church and his board, yet the damage had been done by inference!

There are cases when a person may have done wrong. He had feet of clay and fell; yet there are times it is better to say nothing than to pass on the truth with malice. To the Ephesian Christians Paul wrote, “Speak the truth in love” (Ephesians 4:15). Paul did not suggest that honesty and integrity are enough. He said, “Make sure that you say it in love, or else do not say it, even though it is true.” Truth spoken with a vindictive spirit can be as damaging as a two‑edged sword.

Let three tests guard what you say. If it does not pass these simple tests, do not say it. Write them down, memorize them; let them be guidelines for your speech. Guideline #1: Is it needful? Guideline #2: Is it kind? Guideline #3: Is it true? Jesus Christ said, “For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.” (Matthew 12:37). The next time you are tempted to pass on a choice bit of news remember your words can be more deadly than an assassin’s bullet. Be careful how you aim them.

Resource reading: Colossians 3.