And don’t sin by letting anger control you. Ephesians 4:26
What does good and mad look like for you?
When Mark gets entirely upset, you’ll know it. “His voice becomes sharp, the words bitten off and spat out. He steps heavily; he might slam a door… his entire body stiffens up,” His wife says. “He’s scary. I don’t want to be anywhere near him when he’s mad.”[1]
When we experience disappointment or hurt, it’s easy to react in anger. Often, anger is our protective mechanism to escape feeling powerless in our pain or frustration. Anger is a valid feeling—one we will all experience and need to learn to navigate.
But anger can also have dangerous expressions that threaten our loved ones’ sense of safety and derail productive conversations. If our anger makes someone feel unsafe or tears them down with harsh words, we’ve let anger take control. The Bible says, “Don’t sin by letting anger control you” (Ephesians 4:26). When anger habitually controls us, it’s become a destructive force.
If you struggle with losing your temper, ask God’s Holy Spirit to guide you (Galatians 5:16). Despite our good intentions, the Bible says that our sinful natures lead to quarreling, outbursts of anger, dissension, and division (Galatians 5:20). But it says that “the Holy Spirit produces a long list of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control” (Galatians 5:22-23).
Jesus doesn’t leave us at the mercy of our anger—He gives us His Spirit to help us grow in self-control even while we process real and powerful feelings of anger. God acknowledges your feelings, but He says you don’t have to be controlled by them. Call on His Spirit first, the next time you feel yourself getting good and mad!
[1] Page, Shannon. “The Astonishing Power of Male Anger.” Medium, Humungus, 22 Apr. 2020, medium.com/humungus/the-astonishing-power-of-male-anger-4cd896e38c93.
