“I can do everything through him who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:13).
From the beginning of recorded history, men and women have become entrapped by vices that eventually become habits which lead to addictions. When a child comes into the world, the little child is born with certain drives which are vital for survival. Strongest of them is the desire for food and water. But as we grow older, emotional drives include the need for community and relating to each other. You will never find a hermit living alone or secluded who at some point in his life wasn’t wounded emotionally.
Question: How does an addiction differ from a physical or emotional drive? First, an addiction is a thirst which, if denied, has devastating physical consequences. You can go without food or water for several days without real harm, but when you are addicted and denied the drugs or the source of your addiction, you suffer. Another differentiating mark is that an addiction is something you cannot control; it controls you. And third, an addiction is something which is generally harmful to your mind, your body, your relationships, and/or your spiritual life.
Experts say that addictions are on the increase today as the result of the stress confronting us, the disarray of relationships today, and the visual stimulation of our senses which produce an unreal sort of existence. Initially, those who become hooked on an addiction, whether it is porn, drugs, or alcohol, live in denial. “Sure, I can handle this,” people say.” But the reality is they don’t, and won’t admit that they cannot. They turn to their addiction because they choose to and because they are not able to resist it.
How do you break out of an addiction? The following guidelines can help you break through your bondage.
Guideline #1: Come to grips with reality. As painful as it may be, you must admit that you are hooked–addicted is a more descriptive word. Denial is deadly. You also need to acknowledge that your habit is detrimental to your life and those who love you. Long ago, James in the New Testament wrote, “Therefore, to him who knows to do good and does it not, to him it is sin” (James 4:17, NKJV). Society may call it a moral lapse, a mistake, or a failure—a habit. God calls it sin. The good news, however, is there is help and hope for those who confess that sin and will forsake it.
Guideline #2: Be willing to get help and allow others to help you. Now, if you were capable of shutting off that habit, you wouldn’t be addicted to it. Talking to your pastor, to a counselor, to a trusted friend—that is a positive step forward.
Guideline #3: Be accountable. When James wrote in the New Testament book that bears his name that we are to confess our faults one to another, he wasn’t suggesting that you broadcast your failure, but he does mean that you become willing to let someone look you straight in the eye and ask you the tough questions—the ones you would prefer not facing. If your husband or wife talks with you about a weakness in his life or character, don’t turn your back on him or her and walk the other direction. Rather, be the encourager who helps him get unhooked and become a better husband, father, friend, son, or daughter. You can be a tremendous influence in the life of those who are close to you—you can make a difference.
Guideline #4: Trust God for the strength you lack. There is divine strength—God’s help—for your weakness, forgiveness for your failure, help for your need, and His grace to help you overcome.
Resource reading: Romans 8:26-27.
