Bible Text: 2 Corinthians 5:17 | Speaker: Dr. Harold J. Sala | Series: Guidelines For Living |

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! 2 Corinthians 5:17

“He’ll never change! He’s been that way for so long, I’ve given up hope!” Don’t be too sure, for the reality is that we do change, whether or not we like it. But there’s something else which has to fit into the change formula. All change is not necessarily for the better. As Ellen Glasgow wrote, “All change is not growth; as all movement is not forward.” Simply because things may be different doesn’t mean anything has really changed.

When someone tells me, “He’ll never change!” it’s usually a token of frustration. That person has been prodding, cajoling, nagging, and pushing. The impenetrable force has met the immovable object! And the two collide.

I’ve come to the conclusion that a lot of women marry, then set out to change the men in their lives, and when those men don’t change, they despair. After they try all the tricks they know, they give up. When it comes to people, if I did not believe that change is possible, I’d quit doing what I do. But where we often fail is not understanding what makes people change.

OK, how do you get someone to change? Better yet, ask, “What makes someone want to change?” Here’s a child who doesn’t read. Yes, he’s a TV specialist. He watches it hour after hour. So if you tell him, “Look, I want you to start reading,” he’ll immediately change, right? Dead wrong! He’ll ignore you. But if I tell him, “Look, I’ll give you a reward for reading. When you read five books, you get this. When you read ten, you get something else; and the reward becomes the motive.

Psychologists will tell you that when a young man is headed downstream with the turbulence getting greater as he is carried towards the raging falls that crash on the rocks below, one of the few things that can cause him to really stop and change is the love of a woman. When she says, “If you keep on doing this, you can’t have me, but if you stop and go a different direction, then we have a future,” there is a motive to change.

There is another powerful motive for change, and it is the one that I believe you can help bring about. It is the change that comes as God works in someone’s life, effecting change from within, not without. When you stop trying to effect change and put someone in God’s hands, and turn loose so He can get His strong hands around someone’s heart and life, it is quite amazing what happens.

Wherever you find a men’s fellowship in almost any church, you will find men who can tell you, “God changed my life!” They can say, “This is what my life used to be,” and then “This is how God changed my life,” and “Now this is what it is.” The difference: what God wrought–which the nagging of a wife, the threats of the law, or even the restrains of prison could not bring about.

When I spoke to a men’s conference, there was a time for sharing, and I shall never forget the words of a biker—a big tough guy with tattoos plastered over his muscled arms, a leather vest, and a gut that extended a considerable distance over his belt. He began, saying, “When I came here I had three choices: kill another man, kill myself, or give myself to God, and that’s what I did. He’s changed my heart.”

Question: How long should you wait for God to change that stubborn person in your life? The simple but trustworthy answer is, “As long as it takes!” Some things are worth waiting for, and allowing God to do what only He can accomplish is worth waiting for.

Resource reading: 2 Corinthians 5