Love is very patient and kind, never jealous or envious, never boastful or proud, never haughty or selfish or rude. Love does not demand its own way. It is not irritable or touchy. It does not hold grudges and will hardly even notice when others do it wrong.  It is never glad about injustice, but rejoices whenever truth wins out. If you love someone, you will be loyal to him no matter what the cost. You will always believe in him, always expect the best of him, and always stand your ground in defending him. I Corinthians 13:4-7

 

Music, poetry, movies…all spread the lie that love should be easy. In reality, relationships are hard.

Relationships are hard because love is difficult. Love might seem easy over a candlelight dinner or when first holding your newborn child, but we quickly learn how difficult it becomes when we’re tired or irritated!

The Bible’s description of love goes like this: “Love is large and incredibly patient. Love is gentle and consistently kind to all. It refuses to be jealous when blessing comes to someone else. Love does not brag about one’s achievements nor inflate its own importance. Love does not traffic in shame and disrespect, nor selfishly seek its own honor. Love is not easily irritated or quick to take offense. Love joyfully celebrates honesty and finds no delight in what is wrong. Love is a safe place of shelter, for it never stops believing the best for others. Love never takes failure as defeat, for it never gives up” (I Corinthians 13:4-7).

No wonder relationships are hard work—we’re all still learning how to love one another! One writer described love as a “painful, poignant, touching attempt by two flawed individuals to try and meet each other’s needs in situations of gross uncertainty and ignorance about who they are and who the other person is, but deciding we’re going to do our best anyway.”[1]

When your best inevitably falls short, remember the source of our love. Jesus said, “Love each other in the same way I have loved you” (John 15:12b). The more aware we are of God’s love for us, the more strengthened we’ll be in our love for others.

[1] Tippett, Krista. “Alain de Botton: The True Hard Work of Love and Relationships.” On Being with Krista Tippett, 11 Feb. 2021, https://onbeing.org/programs/alain-de-botton-the-true-hard-work-of-love-and-relationships/.